


Loose Change

by NeverComingHome



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Age Difference, Jealousy, M/M, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2017-11-25
Packaged: 2019-02-06 13:05:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12818142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverComingHome/pseuds/NeverComingHome
Summary: Jax falls for the wrong Martin, but never figures out which of them was the right one.Vague spoilers for the first couple episodes of season three.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Contains: non-consensual voyeurism, jealousy, mind/body melding, age difference, sex, bittersweet ending

To a make a long convoluted story short: Jax had a crush on a twenty five year old Martin Stein.

To make a short story slightly longer: Jax had a crush on a time shadow made from a paradox caught and nurtured by the waverider’s time vortex. Said time shadow’s reality caved in on itself when the Legends corrected the problem, but as long as the shadow remained in close proximity of the waverider his exposure to the time vortex kept him from fading into nonexistence.

Sara hooked an arm around Marty’s shoulders. “A Stein on the ship and a Stein in the field sounds aces to me. What say ye crew?"

The older(and arguably more real) Martin objected immediately. “There is absolutely no way to calculate how tremendously terrible an idea that truly is, Ms. Lance.”

“Gideon?”

**“Marty's presence on the ship will increase efficacy by approximately 98.56%.”**

“Thank you, Gideon,” Martin bit out beneath his breath while the others welcomed the ship’s new member.

Ray assigned himself and Nate as Marty's welcoming committee and Jax could feel Martin’s annoyance psychically tugging at him which only spoke to the strength of Marty’s likability to overcome it. Despite the fact that he had no choice but to remain on the ship (at least until they could find a way for him to exist outside of its range) he took to the tour with overwhelming enthusiasm. Jax found him hours later staring dreamily into space with his arms crossed.

“It is strange how I would much rather be home even with all this laid before me.”

“I didn't have much of a choice joining the Legends either. It's hard, but this place will grow on you.”

“Well then, if indeed I am to be the ‘home base Stein’ I would rather prefer a working knowledge of the ship’s mechanics- from the mainframe down to the bolts. Mr. Palmer has informed me that falls within your purview.”

Jax took it for granted that Martin was in his head; he knew everything Jax knew and thus never saw any reason to master the day to day tasks of the waverider. In all fairness there was no reason for him to, but the way Marty matter-of-factly engrossed himself in Jax’s teaching was endearing. Jax could see kernels of Martin in the way Marty would wax philosophical on how his work would’ve undoubtedly led to the concept of such a ship if he’d had the resources, never minding that its core mechanics worked in opposition to Marty’s current research. The point being that only a superior mind could make improvements and it was very smart of their captain to perceive how well equipped he was to instigate the tides of change.

Jax finished replacing the panel and shimmed out from the cranny beneath it.

“I got a question, when did you start talking that?”

“I am afraid I don’t follow.”

“You know, like someone is standing around taking notes.”

Marty harrumphed, “Perhaps someone should.”

“Oh they do, eventually, ask Ray.” He swatted Marty’s leg. “I will give you one whole dollar if you can repeat that speech you just gave like a hillbilly.”

“Do I have to do the accent?”

“Nah.”

“...may I do the accent?”

Which only lead to Martin coming across the pair of them bent over laughing as Marty and Jax recited all the Shakespeare they could remember in their most ridiculous southern drawl. Aghast he asked them sternly if they’d ‘taken the pot again’ which provoked a new ripple of hysterics until he stomped off in the opposite direction.

* * *

 

It started to become an uncommon thing for Marty and Jax to be seen apart on the ship. When Marty was on Gideon duty Jax would hang around to curate a playlist of songs for him from the years he had yet to experience. When Jax did his rounds Marty would regale him with trivia, personal anecdotes and the fundamentals of quantum mechanics. While on missions Marty gave equal attention to the Legends, but Firestorm was always his first, last and most frequent check in. If pressed for an answer Jax couldn’t say whether he preferred Marty’s charged and hopeful “good luck” or the relieved satisfaction in his “welcome back”.

“So when’s the wedding?” Mick drawled while himself, Sara, Ray, Nate and Martin played cards after another successful capture and release of an aberration. Martin nearly fumbled his cards as the others chuckled.

“I beg your pardon.”

“Nothing wrong with two guys hanging out alone with their shirts off.”

Sara raised and threw another bill into the pile. “Nate's right, it’s cute.”

“You in or out Palmer?”

Ray folded. “I'm sure it's strictly platonic.”

“Ray’s out. Show ‘em boys.”

Martin tossed his hand into the middle of the table and told them they had absolutely no idea what they were talking about. Mick snaked an ace from Martin’s cards and declared himself the winner which prompted an unruly response from Sara that Martin chose to ignore as he made his way to the gym. Staying out of sight he watched Marty’s arms squeeze encouragingly around Jax’s legs, his voice rising with each sit-up surpassing one hundred. At one point Jax raised up and his eyes landed on Marty’s mouth. When Marty noticed he whispered ‘what?’ and the word hung between them in a silence punctuated only by Jax’s panting. Martin’s skin felt warm. He’d been keeping his distance psychically from Jax under the guise of privacy, but now he understood what it really was.

“Gentlemen,” he interrupted and felt the snake of embarrassment run through Jax as the two pulled away from one another, “do you mind if I join?”

“You’re hardly dressed for the occasion, old chap.” Their eyes lighted on Martin’s slacks and sweater vest.

“I meant to say I’m feeling rather unstable. Jefferson? I believe a bonding session is in order.”

Jax made to leap to his feet, but Marty placed a steadying hand on his shoulder. “It’s only been a few days since you became Firestorm.”

“I apologize if I lead you to believe this was any of your business. Jefferson?”

Marty’s face contorted with the promise of a scathing reply, but Jax said that he had been feeling a little off and it didn’t hurt to get in more transmutation practice before the next big bad was breathing down their necks. Marty waved it off, but Martin could recognize the look on his younger self’s face because it was the same one on his own.

* * *

 

Attila the Hun, fresh from having to pull his troops from what he believed to be victory was displaced and replaced with the desire to establish a true and lasting dynasty. Armed with knowledge he managed to successfully take Italy, flout death and preempt the fall of his empire by divvying up the free world with a roman empire that lasted into the late 1940’s where the Legends were taking a pit stop. Archery-type weaponry had developed into mechanized arrows that burrowed relentlessly into Nate’s steel form, the product of a hundred years worth of research focused on penetrating all man made materials.

“GUYS! This is not ticklish anymore.”

“On it.”

Firestorm rushed to Nate’s defense while Sara and Mick went after the soldiers behind the arrows. Ray was in the past with the waverider and Marty trying to find an Attila that was still resting from battle which didn’t necessarily help them out in the present. Firestorm and Nate battled the soldiers onto a military base whose bunker they planned on trapping them in. In trying to lead them into a trap Firestorm was lead into one as well, the base being a nuclear test facility that one of the soldiers activated to release ionized radiation. Firestorm’s powers were interrupted and they were left to hand to hand combat with people seasoned and conditioned for battle.

Firestorm was up against a wall, mouth bloody and thrumming with power just out of reach when the waverider crashed outside and emitted an EMP that disabled the base’s emergency defenses. The disruption was enough of a distraction for Nate to shake off his own opponents and buy Firestorm enough time to recharge and fly them back to the ship. Jax and Martin separated with a gasp, the wounds sustained while their powers were gone manifesting physically on Jax and psychically in Martin. Before Martin could reach out to Jax Marty was sliding across the floor to catch him before he could collapse.

“I told you what the base was for, damn it.”

“It was the only way.”

“You could’ve gotten yourself killed.”

“You worry too much.”

“I’m beginning to think I don’t worry enough.”

“Give the boy some air, why don’t you?” Martin growled.

The team snapped into action, supporting Jax to the medical bay and Martin to his room while Marty watched with fists loosely clenched.

 

* * *

 

Weeks later and Marty was still treating Jax like he was made of glass. Jax was sure the other man thought he was being stealthy, but there was nothing sneaky about the way he no longer pressed Jax to beat his previous day’s gym numbers. His first impulse was to confront him, but Martin’s denial about whatever he was in denial about was affecting Jax’s usual bluntness and he couldn’t find the wherewithal to ask. It wasn’t as if he was in short supply of personal concerns after all.

He was concerned about whatever happened on the last mission that had Ray and Nate giving each other the silent treatment.

He was concerned with Mick and Sara’s fight spilling onto the field and putting them all at risk.

He was concerned with Rip’s new time bureau constantly breathing down their necks.

He was concerned about the way he felt seeing Marty asleep at the controls, Marty with his shirt off, and Marty panting for him to slow down as they raced around the ship through ye olde England’s marshes.

 

* * *

 

He and Martin had fairly early on established “me time”, agreeing that any and all activities they’d like to remain at least somewhat private would be announced as such and the other party would occupy themselves accordingly with Jax having the advantage of losing himself in the physicality of working out or repairing engines. Martin’s only outlet, however, was to pick up an engrossing book and attempt to ignore the physical repercussions of Jax’s alone time. He was wrapping up a book he was grateful to see the end of when _‘me time’_ floated into his thoughts he felt the subtle stirrings of arousal.

_For personal reasons I must insist you give it a rest for tonight._

_No can do, it’s important._

_How important could it be?_

_Take a cold shower and try not to think so loudly for the next half hour important_.

Jax felt Martin retreat from his thoughts in a huff. He made sure his room was locked and spread out on his bed. When push came to shove there was no better way to confirm attraction than the obvious. He took himself in hand and pictured Marty at the foot of his bed without a shirt on. Nothing. Marty at the foot of his bed in slacks and sweater vest? Well there wasn’t not anything. Marty at the foot of his bed taking off his slacks and asking Jax if he was going to take off his too. Marty calling chaos theory ‘too mainstream’ as he lowered his mouth between Jax’s legs. Marty’s head going down, Martin’s head coming up. Before Jax could dissect that, stop himself from fixating on white hair and a deeper voice, he came into his hand with a barely stifled moan.

* * *

 

Three missions later Martin dropped an armband in front of Jax.

“Venturing into the world of high fashion Mr. Stein?”

Martin didn’t so much as glance at Marty.

“It is an inhibitor, Jefferson, and I wish you to wear it. I’ve decided we need a more aggressive barrier to establish privacy. This will sever our psychic connection while worn, I ask that you be diligent in activating and reactivating when necessary.”

Jax was already wrapping the device around his upper arm and pressing buttons. Martin felt the sensation of the cotton and a gentle warmth as it calibrated then nothing. Jax stared at him in silence and Martin no longer knew what type of silence it was. They each felt like they could guess the other’s emotion, but neither was sure enough to do so aloud. Marty tapped his mug of coffee against Jax’s.

“Cheers!”

 

* * *

 

It wasn’t like Jax immediately jumped Marty’s bones after testing out the inhibitor. Those concerns he had were still concerns and Attila had managed to yet again evade a memory wipe so there was that too. Marty was pushing the waverider and Gideon to the limits while also becoming increasingly frustrated with his inability to exist further than a yard away from the ship. Now that Martin wasn’t in his head constantly, filling him with denial, Jax could see clearly that ironically enough the answer was Martin.

“Why don’t you let him help you out, man? Sara said it before: two Steins are better than one.”

Marty had caged himself in with glass whiteboards and two markers to puzzle out his situation. He continued calculating as he spoke and Jax spun around in a chair just outside the cube.

“We may share a past, but I’ll be damned if he’s my future.”

“Alright, what's up with you? Grey is not a bad guy.”

“In terms of ethics perhaps, but otherwise the man is morally barren. The way he looks at-” Marty stopped mid sentence upon meeting Jax’s eye and finished the current equation in silence.

“We can’t do this without him.”

Marty was staring at the numbers, but the markers remained still in his hand. 

* * *

 

One week quickly became two weeks and two weeks turned into the next two missions and Jax was there for nearly every session without ever managing to figure out how two people so similar in nature could argue so much. Marty’s energy was chaotic and unfocused, he dismissed Martin’s proposals out of hand if they slightly resembled what he’d previously worked through. Martin was methodical and organized, he insisted on revisiting every dismissed solution through different lenses and analyzing the same material from countless perspectives with the help of Gideon. He firmly told Marty that his method of throwing solutions at the problem in the hopes of something sticking was laziness. Marty snapped that if if they took it apart like a car he’d be dead by the time they figured out it was the engine. Martin replied that car metaphors were inept and jejune.

“You’re jejune. Come, Jax, I have a strong desire to be anywhere, but here.”

“The waverider’s net was stunted on the last trip. It’s not safe for you to leave.”

Jax nodded at Martin’s words. “He’s right. Let’s take a break, watch a movie?”

“Perhaps a documentary explaining to Marty why wormhole singularity is not an episode of Star Trek.”

“Yes, and in the interim you may ruminate on how your entire career was built on the backs of my PHDs.”

It was the most civil goodbye the pair had exchanged since working together and Jax was glad for the laid back sanctity of his room. Gideon put up a screen and they chose a comedy from the eighties, a pure slapstick film to get away from the action packed saga that was their everyday life. Halfway into the movie they were on the bed laughing into one another’s shoulder. Jax was so used to chaos and drama that the slow calm with which Marty met his gaze before kissing him was exciting in its own way. His mouth was soft, his hair felt good between his fingers when Jax tugged him closer, and the room began to slowly darken. He thought of the fantasy he’d had about Marty and kissed him harder, letting his shirt be pushed up Marty could press his fingers into Jax’s skin and tug at the waistband of his jeans.

“Wait.”

“For what?” Marty’s hand moved down, grabbing between Jax’s legs.

“This is weird. You’re-”

“I am not Martin.” He unzipped Jax to expose his erection. “Do you get like this when you think of him?” Jax didn’t reply. Marty’s hand was moving on him as he brought himself eye level to Jax’s waist. “Close your eyes if it helps.” Jax did and Marty swallowed him. Jax tried to keep himself from thinking about the fact that if Marty was experienced doing this it meant Martin was experienced and if Marty found him attractive, was there apart of Martin that...

“Fuck.” He came (embarrassingly quick), but Marty continued to rub all the right spots and work his mouth in all the right ways so that it felt like only a few minutes later when Jax came again; his hips lifting off the bed to grind further down Marty’s throat. His vision went black then white and when he opened his eyes his skin felt hot, red dots partially blotting the view of Marty wiping his mouth with Jax’s bedsheet.

“Have you done this before with a man?” Before Jax could respond he spotted the inhibitor resting deactivated on the floor. He pushed briefly, cautiously, into Martin and of all the emotions he might’ve predicted (disgust, annoyance, anger, exhaustion) the one he didn’t expect was an overwhelming sense of loss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will contain and end with Martin's POV


	2. Chapter 2

Clarissa had given him a pass for Jax. He’d immediately scoffed, but she’d insisted that sharing his body with someone could bring up feelings she didn’t want him to agonize over, but agonize he did. It wasn’t the guilt of wanting someone other than his wife, it was the guilt of wanting someone he already had taken so much from. Martin’s influence was all over Jax like wet paint, sticking to everything that touched the boy who was not really a boy, but a man he was bonded to on multiple levels.

They were in one another’s heads even when they weren’t gallivanting with the Legends coupled and tripled with Martin directing Jax’s education through tutoring and mentor-ship. If there could be one anything he gave him, one thing Martin could keep his nose out of, it should’ve been Jax’s love life.

He began working on the inhibitor when he could no longer deny that Clarissa was right. The inhibitor's design was originally a one way function to mask himself from Jax while still being connected to him in case of an emergency. It was an excuse, and worse, it was such a lousy excuse he hadn’t bothered to run it past Mick who would always nod along to the most absurd proposals. He’d told the excuses to himself and very nearly believed it for more than a few months. Then he and Jax were Firestorm and the stakes were high and the clock was ticking and they were blasting at every dragon faced mutant coming at them, but Martin still couldn’t figure out how to reverse the gamma unit without compromising their powers. He couldn’t remember the exact phrasing of Jax’s words, but the tone of them was harder than he thought possible. Jax tapped into an inner wisdom developed quickly when people were dying around you.

When they were side by side on the waverider again it was all Martin could do to not turn their long hug into an intimate embrace. He went to his room, strapped on the inhibitor and pressed into Jax’s thoughts. He felt Jax’s muscles tighten as he undressed and stretched before taking a shower, the ghost of hot water pounding against his skin as Jax opened his mouth and let it flow into and over him/them. He felt Jax’s attraction growing towards Marty until it culminated in the night Martin pressed into Jax’s fantasy just long enough to see Marty crawling towards him with the most blatant of intentions. The sound his glass of water made as it shattered against the wall across from him barely escaped the room. It was only then that he’d fulfilled the inhibitor’s dual purpose and it always worked until it didn’t and he felt a mouth that was his and not his wrap itself around Jax who was full of all the lust and infatuation Martin felt wrongly entitled to.

* * *

 

“I suggest you end it before he does. I...he’s not ready for a commitment.”

"I could be different.”

“You are an exceptional young man," Martin made sure he felt nothing, but contempt when he said, "but different you are not.”

* * *

 

Jax didn’t listen and Martin couldn’t blame him. Marty was practically on top of the boy constantly once word spread through the ship. Ray and Nate made up from their fight just to toss a football back and forth in the kitchen and gossip about the situation.

“Does that mean our Stein is bi too?”

“Has to be.”

“And Jax is his type.”

Nate laughed. “Dude, you’re so jealous it’s not you.”

“Am not.” Ray threw the foam football into Nate’s waiting hands. “I get it. Jax is a solid eight.”

“Nine when he’s Firestorm.”

“But I’m the one who gave Marty his first tour. We clicked. We talked about strange attractors for an hour.”

“Maybe, but Jax restructured the Waverider’s engine using caveman tools. Don’t tell anyone, but for a second? I felt a little bi too.”

Mick’s voice suddenly filled the room. “One of you numbnuts is leaning on the intercom. Entire ship heard. Rory out.”

* * *

 

Martin watched Jax fall in love with him. He felt Jax falling in love with him. They were still running off to battle in and with each other, but as soon as they were back on the ship it was Marty who kissed Jax and snapped the inhibitor none too subtly back into place. Martin supposed it was fitting that he hated himself and his self hated him for the same reasons. It was very nearly a relief actually to not be the only one who understood why he and Jax did not belong together. Whenever he wavered (stared too long or placed a proprietary hand on Jax’s shoulder when they were in a team huddle) Marty was there to fill the small spaces between them.

Until one day he wasn’t.

When Jax and Marty began having sex Martin had made it a habit of always wearing his inhibitor so it was with some surprise he walked off the ship for fresh air to see Jax red eyed and on his knees before a slowly closing vortex, Sara and Mick standing on either side of him.

“Rat bastard.”

“Mick’s right,” Sara knelt down to kiss Jax’s cheek. “He doesn’t deserve those tears, hon.”

It didn’t take a genius to figure out what happened. Martin could picture it. Marty putting the pieces together and his first thought being to get home. What Marty had felt as he contemplated an unknowable, difficult life versus an easier, uncomplicated one was what caused Martin to choose Clarissa over Jacob. Martin walked backwards onto the ship as Mick threw a glass bottle into the vortex before it closed.

* * *

 

In the end they don’t need to talk about it. Jax showed up at his door one night and Martin let him inside knowing what would happen. They kissed with the lights on and Jax’s mouth was so warm it burned, but in the way they were both constantly burning and lurching in their own skins. He knew Jax didn’t fall in love with Marty because he couldn’t have Martin, the thoughts and bits of old fantasies predated the younger Martin's presence and it was reassurance enough. There was no point in trying to make sense of it. The inhibitors were dead and they were falling into one another sloppily without regrets or guilt. They mumbled a few words and questions. Martin needed to know if Marty had fucked Jax before, but apparently they hadn’t gotten that far so Jax had only been on top. Martin went slow, gripping him firmly from behind and nearly phasing into him when they came together like a single heartbeat.

* * *

 

The results came back and the device was ready to separate them once and for all. They were standing back to back, linked together by the machine which was gearing up for the stabilization.

_I love you_

Before they could figure out who thought it first, Gideon activated the switch.


End file.
